HOROSCOPES

CAPRICORN

I understand you’re a workaholic, Capricorn, but I’m sure even you’ll agree these past few years have been intense. This year Saturn enters your twelfth house, so its time to get zen. If the thought of working less and sleeping more makes you anxious, find comfort in the fact that your north node of fate is at the top of your chart – meaning that even in relaxation mode, your career is propelled to new heights. The lunar eclipse in April will make you increasingly popular and sought-after, and Jupiter’s position in your chart promises lots of help from colleagues, friends (and everyone you’ve slept with) so just trust the ascent and remember to say “thank you.” And while I know nothing blows your socks off like a good career/social climb, your happiness may border on mania; so I reiterate, the theme of 2015 for you, Capricorn, is to learn to chill.


AQUARIUS

You know that feeling you’ve been having lately- that your work is going to get the recognition it deserves; that you’ll find love and have time to enjoy it; that your network is strong, vast and supportive – basically that everything’s coming together? It’s real. With mercury in retrograde ’till Feb. 11th you start the year reviewing and reevaluating your current relationships. This retrograde is important because since 2012 your relationships have been through a series of tests. Your resilience has earned you respect amongst your peers, and your life is about to become a lot more public, which is why it’s important to have all your ducks in a row. Even sociopaths deserve love and admiration, and with Leo in your partnership zone until August, you’re about to get loads of it. In fact, all your luck comes from partnerships this year. Over the summer you’ll slow your pace and plan all your work projects carefully; in mid-September you’ll execute them flawlessly. After that, nothing will be the same. You’re welcome; enjoy your year!


PISCES

That whole dreamy, hocus-pocus, sexpot vibe of yours increases its intensity this year (God help us all). There are a few times you really can’t afford to be off in la-la land though, your birthday month being one of them. There’s a solar eclipse on March 20th that will bring your health and healing to the forefront. This includes expelling toxic relationships or situations from your life. “Merging” is also a theme for you this year (again…), but with Jupiter in your opposite sign of Virgo, you start to show some discrimination in how, and with whom, you share your affections. Money is really unpredictable this year, and you might have to learn a lesson or two about detachment from material things. Speaking of detachment, thanks to Neptune, you’re in full-on escapist mode this summer, and it serves you well in helping you design the life you’d like to lead. You’ll have the opportunity to manifest your dreams into reality by October, so I’ll need you and your lover to come back down to Earth before then, thanks.


ARIES

Shit’s been DARK these past few years with Saturn in your underworld sector. You’ve faced every fear, unveiled every kink and dusted every black corner. In 2015, you’re coming back into the light and you’re ready to GO in true Aries form. The only difference now, is that you’ve been humbled by the depths of your own subconscious hell, and the new you is more self-aware, altruistic, and diplomatic. You’re reconnecting with yourself in an inspired and creative way, and you’ll be more discerning about who you let enter your world. Mars starts the year off strong in the area of networking and long-term goals. In February you retreat, and in March you’re irresistible, but I’d focus more on career than love this first quarter, mainly because Pluto retrogrades in April. Pluto is still present in your chart all year round, changing and reinvigorating your career, but it’s important for you to gain momentum now. April through August is extremely creative for you, and August through December is lucky and expansive, in terms of work. You might also find a strong mentor this year. Welcome back, Aries.


TAURUS

You can let your guard down, Taurus, because Saturn is finally leaving your relationship sector. With the exception of a brief stint from June – September, you’re free from all the harrowing “lessons” and relationship drama you’ve had to endure recently. In fact, the first half of this year is about letting go, being grateful, and living in the moment. Once you’ve mastered this whole “new year, new me” thing (you’re the only person in the zodiac who actually might) Jupiter enters your house of romance and stays until 2016.  At this point, your earthy sex appeal reaches an all-time high, and you have a better chance at finding love than anyone else in the zodiac. You’ll also feel empowered, having worked through most of your love demons in 2014. Your north node of fate in your tenth house means a busy work-life too. An important theme in 2015 will be finding balance. Saturn enters your house of resourcefulness and research this year, meaning you might be asking yourself a lot of questions about what you ought to be doing with your life, what really moves you, and other existential queries. Maybe get a therapist this year, so you don’t bore your friends with all your soul searching.


GEMINI

You’ve gone fisty cuffs with the universe for the past five years, Gemini, and this year it starts to pay off. The 2015 curtain rises with you dreaming big. You’re magnetism is high, so you’re able to attract the right collabs to bring your fantasies to fruition. You get the best results if you plan your projects early and launch them by spring. You generally tend to be a non-committal, one-man band, but 2015 is all about learning the sacred art of the partnership. This means consistency. It also means feeling out your boundaries, increasing the quality of your attention and practicing compromise. In September, your focus shifts to perfecting your living situation, and with Mars and Venus cooperating, you’ll have everything you need to ensure this. Jupiter manages your communication this year, so that borderline schizo personality returns to a more natural and carefree state.


CANCER

our year starts with some emotional turbulence (ugh, of course it does, always you!) but fortunately you’re at the end of a transformational phase that’s been affecting you, your family, your relationships and your career (basically everything that matters to you.) By March, you’ll feel brand new, and your focus will shift to creating the perfect home. Your love life remains the same, but you trade passive, co-dependent tendencies for more assertive and independent behavior. You may be spending a lot of dough, especially the first half of the year, but your earning potential is equally high. The second half of the year you’re more interested in gaining knowledge and a mentorship in your field than income. Saturn in your house of daily activities gets you organized and productive, which will be helpful when your career experiences a status boost after the September eclipse. The edits you’ve made recently as far as the people in your life, prove positive too. Way to not be a crybaby and get your life together!


LEO

Your reign of glory continues, Leo. While Jupiter is still in your sign, your charisma and personal magnetism abound. When it leaves your sign this summer, it enters your area of wealth and abundance, a real win-win. The only thing keeping you down is a sense of loss and/or family drama, but these experiences are ending, and they’ve actually made you a more diplomatic and effective communicator, not to mention way less self-absorbed (who would’ve thought?). This is important, because Saturn enters your house of creativity, passion and romance this year, and everything lies in your ability to communicate your vision to the masses. 2015 also brings you a lot of opportunities for love, and a chance at meeting a partner equally as fair and communicable as you’ve become. As far as your career and creative endeavors, it’s important to gain as much recognition as possible for the first half of the year, as this makes it easier for you to set your plans into motion during the second half. Usually the center of attention, you’ve been in somewhat of a personal exile recently, but it comes to an end now…better watch the throne.


VIRGO

I know how weird you get when you unexpectedly become the center of attention, so let me just warn you now: Jupiter is entering your sign this August, and you’re about to become everyone’s favorite person. Fortunately, you now have eight months to practice/plan/prepare… basically, be a Virgo. In all honesty we both know how meticulously you’ve worked these past few years; you deserve a reward. Come August, everyone will want to sleep with you, and your career will soar to new heights (the two don’t have to be related). In September, a series of eclipses will change your status quo unexpectedly, resulting in a better outcome for your life than you anticipated. Your money situation remains strong and steady all year, and Saturn will help you feel more grounded in your home. It’s important to continue to choose your words and actions carefully this year, but that being said, once Jupiter enters your sign its equally important to honor your newfound spontaneity.


LIBRA

Surprise, surprise, this year is all about relationships and communicating! And while you start the year with your usual mind-fuck obsessions about relationships (single vs. casual vs. marriage vs. dating vs. friends) a series of eclipses in April usher in a new perspective, and by September, you start to see yourself in a different and refreshing light. As far as communicating, your gift of gab can sometimes get you into trouble, so speaking truthfully and authentically is a big theme for you in 2015. Career-wise, you gain significant recognition all year, but it’s crucial that you continue communicating boundaries, and avoid people pleasing. Socially, you’ll be very busy ‘till August, at which point you’ll retreat for some much needed rebalancing. You might have the urge to completely detach during the last quarter of the year – do it – 2016 is going to be epic for you, and you’ll need the reserve fuel.


SCORPIO

You’ve gone to the depths of hell and returned a bright shining star, free of the fears and insecurities that have crippled you since 2012. You’ve achieved a miracle that only someone as intense and transformational (and psychotic) as a Scorpio can achieve; an actual rebirth. It seems like travel reinvigorated you at the start of the year, and with Jupiter in your house of fame and fortune, you’re magnetic and driven all year. In April, you’re extremely productive, but you’ll have to take a pause when Saturn returns again this summer for a final psychic sweep. Once this transit ends, you will have rid yourself of all skeletons and won’t have to deal with Saturn’s return for another thirty years! The rest of 2015 is very positive, but your intensity could be a little, um, intense – even for you. Its cliché to suggest this to a Scorpio, but honestly, the best advice for you is to release all that energy in the bedroom…(or a sex club, swinger shack, bdsm dungeon –you get the point).


SAGITTARIUS

The eternal party monster of the zodiac, you’ve been in an uncharacteristically dark hole since 2012. Fortunately, you’re coming out the other side now, more exuberant than ever. From now until August, Jupiter rules your ninth house of travel and foreign countries. From there it moves to numero ten, casa del career and fame; equaling the most stellar placement you’ve seen here in years. You’ll notice your popularity rise, and your recent fears giving way to a manifestation of your dreams and destiny. Even your love life will be worth your attention; the lunar eclipse in April expels unwanted people and energies from your relationship sector. Say goodbye to lukewarm orgies and hello to momentous coupling. Mid-year might feel a little emotionally dark again, but your current transformation has been so intense, you’ll need this moment to regroup, remember who are, and decide what aspects of your previous self to hold on to. Looks like you’re finally outgrowing your Peter Pan syndrome, Sadge!